Dog Toys: A Pup Parent’s Review

Our furbabies, like human children, have a ton of toys to play with... but seemingly would be just as happy to endlessly chew on an empty plastic bottle or and happily swipe at the large lint balls that our dryer generates. Our babies (furry and furless) have so many toys because we fall in love with the idea of them playing with a plush rocketship or carrying a tiny backpack around. But we’re here to report that not all toys are created equal. As a service, we’ve listed the pros and cons of various popular dog toy types. This list is compiled based on our experiences of buying our dogs many, many different toys.

Squeaky Balls

Squeaky balls seem like a lot of fun for dogs. Unfortunately, they can be extremely disruptive for everyone else. Sure, it’s enjoyable to watch your pup go to town on a squeaky ball for the first 30 seconds... but then the noise gets annoying. How do they get so much enjoyment from just laying there squeaking? And why do they only squeak it in the middle of a Zoom meeting with our managers or during that serious moment in a movie?

Verdict: Perfectly good toy if your dog doesn’t play with it regularly

Grade: C-

Bouncy Balls

A more fit cousin of the squeaky ball, the bouncy ball is fun for the whole family. If your pup isn’t a selfish jerk, you can enjoy periods of fetch and keep away without any fuss. When you aren’t able to play with your pup, the bouncy ball can entertain your pup solo, too! On the flip side, a few hours of your dog darting back and forth erratically after a bouncy ball could get a little annoying.

Verdict: A great choice for an active pup and an engaged pawrent.

Grade: B

Tennis Balls

The tennis ball might be the dog toy from whence all other dog toys were born. I’m guessing they’ve been around and available for snagging in houses for much longer than any dog toys have been on the marker (side note… what is the history of the dog toy??). Additionally, tennis balls combine so many characteristics of contempra dog toys - they have a textured outside, will bounce and can be chased, are chewable, and - perhaps most importantly - the humans frequently take them outside and toss them around.

Verdict: Tennis balls are classic and continue to a dog’s top choice of toy

Grade: B+

Kongs

You probably have friends who say things like “the gym is my happy place,” plan trips with their CrossFit workout partners, and constantly want to tell you about their squat routine. Those people think the Kong is the ideal dog toy. Sure, Kongs are great for distractions when filled with treats (we regularly use them when we leave the pups home alone), but when treat-less, they’re kinda boring.

Verdict: Unless filled with treats, the Kong does not count as a toy.

Grade: Not applicable. Would you list a wrench as your favorite video game? Kongs are a tool, not a toy.

Semi-durable chew toys

The truth about this category is that if the toys are any fun, they aren’t actually going to be very durable. A good chew toy will be torn apart and need to be replaced… this is the toy circle of life and must be respected. Additionally, toys are best when they have some humorous form… like a passport book or container of French fries.

Verdict: Good toys provided you don’t get fooled into thinking longevity is relevant